How Giving Yourself Full Permission Can Change Everything

"When I had permission to eat more food, I started tuning into my body's hunger/fullness more and didn't really feel the need to eat as much anymore. It felt like reverse psychology!" - A coaching client's recent experience moving from a Scarcity Mindset to Abundance Mindset after a history of restrictive plans.

How Long is Your List of Food Rules?

“I don’t eat after 8 p.m.”

“I don’t drink my calories.”

“I avoid carbs on days I don’t do cardio.”

“Absolutely NO sugar or sweets if I want to lose weight!”

Do these sound familiar?

Maybe you’re thinking, “I don’t really have any food rules.” But if you’ve spent years dieting (like I did), there is a good chance you’re living by a few, even if you don’t realize it.

Sometimes those rules are obvious, like “no bread” or “no sugar.” Other times, they show up as subtle beliefs that shape how you eat without you even noticing:

“Carbs make me gain weight.”

“I have no control around candy.”

“I shouldn’t eat that. I already had too much today.”

However, these aren’t facts. Rather they are stories we have absorbed from years of dieting and the pressure to “eat perfectly.”

But here’s the question that really matters: How Do These Food Rules Impact the Way You Behave Around Food?

A Story About When I Finally Said “I’m Done”

In 2020, I hit my breaking point. I was so tired. I was tired of restriction, tired of obsessing over every bite, tired of the anxiety that came with every meal. Mostly, I was tired of hating myself for not being “disciplined enough.” I decided that I no longer could go on behaving the way I had. I was at my dieting "rock bottom." I recall thinking, "what would happen if I put all of the energy I was putting into changing my body, into loving myself how I was instead?"

I decided I was done with dieting. I set parameters for my experiment. I was going to do this for three months and see what happened. No weighing myself, exercising only in a way that I enjoyed, and eating whatever the f*ck I wanted and as much as I wanted.

I remember walking into the grocery store that day, giving myself full permission to buy anything I wanted. I was like a kid in a candy store - literally.

And what did I grab first? A five-pound bag of Sour Patch Kids, of course.

When I got home, I ripped that bag open with so much excitement. I was ready for that rush, that dopamine hit I always got from eating something “off limits.”

But something wild happened… it didn’t come.

Sure, the candy tasted good, but it didn’t feel the same. There was no adrenaline, no sense of rebellion. It was just… candy.

That moment changed everything. Because what I realized was this: when you move from a Scarcity Mindset to an Abundance Mindset around food, everything shifts.

What Is a Scarcity Mindset Around Food?

A scarcity mindset is what happens when you believe food is something you need to control or earn.

It sounds like:

“I can’t have that right now.”

“I’ll start again Monday.”

“If I eat this, I’ll ruin my progress.”

When you restrict or label foods as “bad,” your brain interprets them as scarce. And what do humans do when something is scarce? We long for it. We overvalue it. We crave it even more. So, when you finally “let yourself” have it, you might eat past fullness or feel like you have no control.

Then the guilt sets in. You beat yourself up. You tighten the rules again. The cycle of restriction continues.

This isn’t a lack of willpower. It’s your brain doing exactly what it’s wired to do when it believes something is limited.

What If You Don’t Need More Restriction?

What if the answer isn’t more rules… but less?

I know what you might be thinking: If I let myself eat whatever I want, I’ll lose control and live off junk food.

I get it. I thought that too.

But here’s the truth: when you allow full permission with food, the novelty fades. The power those “forbidden foods” had over you starts to disappear.

When nothing is off-limits, food becomes neutral. When food is neutral, you can finally tune into what your body actually wants and needs — not what your food rules dictate.

Because what we resist, persists and the more you fight food, the more it fights back.

The Shift from Scarcity to Abundance

When you start trusting yourself around all foods — yes, even carbs, sugar, and snacks — your relationship with food softens. You stop feeling “out of control” and start feeling calm.

You no longer need to overeat because you can have that food again tomorrow.

You no longer spiral after one “bad” meal because there are no bad meals.

You no longer feel anxious at a restaurant because you know one meal won’t undo your progress.

Freedom with food doesn’t come from control. It comes from the trust we gain when we give ourselves full permission to eat all foods.

Want to Learn How to Break Your Food Rules for Good?

The first step to changing your relationship with food is awareness and noticing when these patterns show up without judgment.

Once you can identify them, you can start practicing abundance by:

• Allowing all foods to fit without labeling them “good” or “bad.”

• Eating regularly so your body trusts food is always available.

• Checking in with how food makes you feel, not just how it fits into your plan.

• Practicing self-compassion when old thoughts resurface.

Remember, this is a process, not a switch you flip. The goal isn’t to be perfect, but to become more curious and less reactive around food.

When you build that trust with yourself, the obsession quiets down and eating becomes peaceful again.

The Takeaway

You don’t need to follow another rule, detox, or 30-day reset.

You need permission. You need compassion. And you need to trust that your body knows what it’s doing — if you let it.

When you move from scarcity to abundance, food becomes just food and that is when real freedom begins.

If this resonated with you, this is exactly what I help my clients work through in my coaching program. Together, we’ll identify the food rules holding you back, rebuild trust with your body, and create an approach to nutrition that’s rooted in freedom — not fear.

With Love,

Allyson

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